One month prior to its annual shareholders’ meeting, one of the world’s biggest corporations has declared its intention to invest more into social projects in the framework of its CSR efforts. Bridget Coffing, McDonald’s Chief Communications Officer, has announced today:
From the beginning, we have been a company committed to doing the right thing. We have been under a lot of heat over the nutritional value of our food and accused of targeting the minorities and low-income communities, and we have come to realise that we may have let our customers down. The time has come to build them up! Now I must go, my people need me.
With its new initiative, the communications department of the retailer plans to target its loyal long-time patrons. The plan is to offer motivational courses to build the self-esteem of the customers who may be feeling down because of their continuous unemployment, lack of significant other, inability to find clothing in their size, digestive problems, and forfeiture of their houses.
First sessions under the slogan “You’re too big to fail” have already been held in Fresno, Modesto, Jackson and Detroit. The facilitators are optimistic and determined to ‘turn that frustration eating into motivation eating’.
Although the seminars admittedly do not help solving the life problems or breaking the bad habits of their participants, McDonald’s feels it is just as important to offer a venue to express feelings. Also, the meetings should be a ‘welcome change of scenery from the labour office’ and shall help to kill the time that would otherwise be spent mindlessly filling out job applications or watching re-runs of the ‘Real Housewives’. As an added bonus, upon completing the course, all participants will receive a framed certificate and a Happy Meal voucher, and the very best can even become new ‘agents of change’ to further promote this initiative in their neighbourhoods.